Collage: I Choose Joy

DSCN2716

I awake

A heavy, grey mist enveloping me.

Slowly, slowly my mother is fading away.

My father struggles with pain

He struggles to remember the events of the morning

His grandchildren are strangers to him.

My uncle rails against the bitterness of infirmity

‘Oh Death, where is thy sting?’

My cousin, her father’s full time carer,  bears it patiently.

I reflect on the line

‘Old age isn’t for wimps’

In the mean time,

I choose Joy.

I  wrote this a few weeks before my mother died on the 16th of December 2013.

My father’s health and memory have improved since he entered aged care accommodation.

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9 Responses

  1. Lovely to read an honest post without all the bling bling. Thank you 🙂

    • Thank you for your interest in this post, Nomzi.

      • You are welcome 🙂

  2. My condolences on your loss Margaret. Some cycles are difficult to bear yet as you say, joy, can be chosen. Glad your father is improving now.

  3. Thank you Enivea. The end of 2013 was one of new experiences. Myself and one of my sisters were with my mother when she died. Being with someone at their death was new for both of us. My mother truly slipped away.
    Organising a funeral was another first for the family. I am grateful we can now arrange secular ceremonies designed around the beliefs and values of the family.

  4. It is a wonderful thing when we can find a sparkle of joy, in difficult circumstances. At my parting, I hope loved ones can find joyfulness. Life and connection with one another is such a gift. How encouraging that your father is improving, Margaret.

    • Thank you Lori. My father was my mother’s carer for a number of years. At the age of 89, he also is having to embrace new experiences including playing scrabble with other residents at the aged care accommodation and his daughter taking him to lunch at a local pub.

  5. My deepest condolences on the loss of your mother, Margaret. So glad that your father is doing better and finding new friends and activities. This lovely honest post and poem is a reminder that joy is never altogether absent. Blessings.

  6. Thank you for your kind comments, Diane.

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